The Journey Inward

For the month of June, I am each day flipping through Clarity and Connection, by Yung Pueblo, and randomly stopping at a page to read. Using the entry as a prompt, I delve into my thoughts and feelings, find what resonates, and see what answers it might hold for me. It is an exercise in building my Intuition, synthesizing information, making space for creativity, and journeying inward so that I might know myself and others better. Today’s reading was on page 165.

"proper rest..."

On this page, yung pueblo lists what he feels is essential for growth.  I highlighted just the one idea because it is my Achilles heel.  I am a terrible sleeper!  I get very little and as I get older, it's starting to show.  I go to bed way too late, but because I love that time of night.  It's quiet outside, it's quiet in the house, the phone is quiet.  I started this night owl routine when the kids were small. I coveted my time alone to read, write, and work out.  It has stayed with me and been a hard habit to kick.  When I go to bed early, I tend to wake two hours later and be wide awake for hours.  Nighttime is when my mind races the most, catastrophizing everything and everyone.  When I go to bed around 1, I'm exhausted and typically fall fast asleep and stay asleep.  

I'm also someone who goes all day, from one thing to the next.  I take very few rests and downtime, except of course for writing.  I've made progress there, carving out time every day for reading, writing, watching tv or just sitting.

Lack of sleep is taking its toll.  My memory is not as good.  My emotions are closer to the surface.  My patience is shorter.  My body aches.  Do I know this is all due to lack of sleep?  No.  Is it quite possible?  Yes.  

Most importantly, getting enough rest is good self care.  It's nurturing, loving, protective, proactive, gentle and kind.  The body needs rest to restore, revive, reclaim, renew, regenerate, reinvigorate, reinvent.  It needs rest to continue to heal and help and form new habits.  It's my next growth and healing frontier!

Photo:  Montclair, NJ.  6.17.23 by LA