The Journey Inward

A class I’m taking challenged me to play detective and observe my thoughts, words and actions. Where I used to be self critical, self conscious and self battering, I now embrace this practice and the curiosity that goes with wanting to understand, not judge. So this exercise was relatively easy for me.

The step I hadn’t taken was this next one they suggested. When you don’t like what you’re thinking, saying or doing, then deliberately and lovingly craft a counter-message. I have tried affirmations. I have tried catching and releasing emotions. I have tried thanking old habits that seek to “protect” me. I have tried saying, “It’s not surprising you would feel that way.” All of these have worked wonders.

But a counter-message was a new twist and one I was interested in trying. I observed one day that I was overwhelmed, exhausted and tired of giving. I instead said-and out loud-“I listen to my body and give it what it needs. I nurture myself.” I felt empowered, not like a victim.

Later in that day, I observed some of the language I was using: ”too much,” “draining,” “rushed,” “helpless.” I countered those words with “I need time, space and some solitude.”

The next day I found myself feeling jittery, walking quickly wherever I went and heaving heavy sighs. My counter-message was to slow down, take deep breaths and do a body scan.

I’m happy to add this tool to my ever growing toolbox!

Photo: Evergreen, CO. 6.29.24 by LA