The Journey Inward

“Let your heart break so your spirit doesn’t.” Andrea Gibson

Just how many times has my heart been broken?
Surely as a child, when needs went unmet,
Surely as a kindergartener when my first boyfriend, Coleman, moved away,
Surely as a middle schooler when my friends turned on me,
Surely at the hands of misogynistic and predatory men,
Surely at the emptiness I found in relationship,
Surely when I lost friends,
Surely when my dad left this world, and 20 years later, my mom,
Surely I have felt heartbreak.

But just as surely, it is that many times that my spirit has saved me.
Just as many times that I developed self sufficiency,
Just as many times as I connected with others,
Just as many times as I expanded my friend group,
Just as many times as I stood up tall and charted a new course,
Just as many times as I had my needs met by more than one person,
Just as many times as I lived the best qualities of those I lost,
Just as many times as I have needed to.

For it is my indomitable spirit that reminds me
That I am safe within myself,
That I am loved within myself,
That I am accepted within myself,
That I am here for a reason, 
That I am following exactly the path laid out for me,
That there are reasons I may never fully understand,
That I am never alone.

Photo:  Pittsburgh, PA.  8.27.23 by LA