Tag: trauma
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Endurance
“You must endure the trying times and believe the best times are coming.” ~DodinskyThe best times are coming,I know that is true,For they’re already here,With each day anew.I’m living life fully,I’m happy to say,Filled with such gratitude,Every dang day!It starts with my children,My three grown up girls,Out carving their own lives,Improving our world.It extends beyond…
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The Tiny Boat
Tossed and turnedon the choppy current,the small paper boatstraightens her bow and stern,raises her mast higher,and allows her sail to capture the wind.She is aware she appears fragile,and that many doubt she can handle the journey,but she knows what they do not-she is an experienced navigator, having ridden the ripples,braved the breakers,crossed the channels,weathered the…
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Removal Vs. Integration
Recently, the discussion in my groupwas about defects versus faults,removal versus integration.I instantly loved this ideabecause I’ve long wrestled withmy survival traits that mimic personalityand removing traitswhen I feel like I should be accepting them as shadow parts.Confusing.The more we talked,the clearer it became to me,crystal clear really,and I set to work making a list.It…
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Triggered Brain
“Zzzztt!”Button pushed,Blood cold,Heart racing,Mind swirling,Trauma reignited.No rational thinking,No reality check,No pros and cons,No now or then,No phoning a friend,Just fear.Safety,Find safety,Quickly,By any means,On your own,Get out now!Photo: Hopewell, NJ. 7.8.24 by LA
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Who I Am
I read this line today,”Who you are while in extraordinary pain…is not who you are,”And I felt a shift deep inside me,A part that exhaled loudly, sighing, “Phew!”A part that shouted, “See?! I told you!”Another part that said, “I needed to hear that.”I am one who blames myself,Holds myself highly accountable,Feels guilty, overly responsible,And shameful,About…
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Foreign Objects
A handful of years ago, I had a bike accident while riding on a towpath beside the Delaware River. I ended up beneath a couple of bikes and bodies and we all slid a distance before coming to a stop. In addition to cuts, scrapes, swelling and shock, I had a good deal of gravel…
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The Tack
So here’s an interesting story from my childhood, and a bit embarrassing at first glance. But bear with me, because maybe you’ve had a similar experience but under different conditions. For a number of years, my childhood bedroom had a thick, blue shag rug. On my sliding closet doors hung a full length mirror. As…
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Identity
For the month of June, I am flipping through Clarity and Connection, by Yung Pueblo daily and randomly stopping at a page and reading. I am using the entry to delve into my thoughts and feelings, find what resonates, and see what answers it might hold for me. It is an exercise in building my…
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Trauma
For the month of June, I am flipping through Clarity and Connection, by Yung Pueblo daily and randomly stopping at a page and reading. I am using the entry to delve into my thoughts and feelings, find what resonates, and see what answers it might hold for me. It is an exercise in building my…
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Release
The bulk of it envelops you, Settling heaviest upon your shoulders and back, Pressing down on your chest, It weighs you down. But you are determined, Determined to shed it, To lighten your load. Instead, you carry it, Until it feels almost part of you, A comfort in some strange way. And then you add…
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Strength
I’ve been marinating two opposing thoughts recently. A friend said that she considers her difficult experiences in life blessings because they have made her who she is and given her strength. The other stated that you could “validate being strong, without suggesting being traumatized was worth it.” Nate Postlethwait via Twitter) I haven’t decided which…
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Homeostasis
Recently I was working with a high school student on his homework assignment. It was all about homeostasis. We had an interesting conversation about it, he defined it in his own words and conceptualized his project. But I was left pondering the word all night. Homeostasis: the tendency toward a relatively stable equilibrium between interdependent…
The Journey Inward 